grief loss music travel Widow

Music brings back memories

Music gives me the opportunity to try a new playlist to my life.

First date was to a live concert at Jones Beach in New York.  We saw UB40 play with Chrissy Hines from the Pretenders.  It was awesome. They filmed it on MTV.  We both loved music and the concert was great. 1985.

Many more concerts were in our future.  Mike loved to listen to music.  You could see it hit a chord with him.  He played guitar for a few years when I met him, but never pursued it. He would have been happy to do that.

We went to many a live show.  I drove him and a few friends back in the 80’s to the Meadowlands in New Jersey for a Grateful Dead concert.  I mostly remember how the traffic on the Cross Bronx Expressway coming home was as slow as molasses.

Listening to music was a key element in our lives.  Music was always playing.  Usually his type of music.  I had been interested in STYX, Journey and REO Speedwagon back in the 1980s.  He did not have much respect or appreciation for that type of music.

He was more into Jimmy Hendrix for the awesome guitar playing, The Grateful Dead and Jorma Kaukonen to which he had acquired many live music CDs from shows he had seen to choose to listen to as we traveled along our road trip of life.

Moving across  the county to California led to many new venues.  We saw comedy clubs with people who probably became rich and famous.  We saw live music in bars and big concerts at college stadiums.

And we always had a stereo with awesome speakers.

As our children grew, going out for a meal and live music was one night out that we hoped we could get a baby sitter for.  When unexpectedly one night a friend gave us two tickets to a Billy Joel – Elton John concert in NYC, we were there. I even skipped out on being a den mother for the local cub scout troop and called in a substitute that night!

What a treat.

I cried during the tune ‘Tiny Dancer”.

I was so moved.

We both enjoyed music.

So for the past 21 months I have not really been listening to music.  Everything reminds me of Mike and makes me sad.  I only know the songs that I have always known.

I tried to listen to my kids music.  EDM.  Electronic Dance Music.  That is helpful if I need to work out or clean my floors.  Really.  It is energizing and I happen to like the Swedish House Mafia so there!

But I have not found my own music until this past weekend. I started to search for music that calls to me.

One blog I follow mentioned an artist called Regina Spektor.

Seriously, I am not being paid by her at all to mention her name but I put her name on Pandora and I listened to such a nice playlist of tunes.  Most of them I had never heard of before so that was actually nice.  I love my memories, but I am trying hard to move forward, so listening to new songs is better that crying over old tunes and memories.

Music gives me the opportunity to try a new playlist to my life.

Listening to inspiring songs with words attached can make me feel hopeful.

It is a time of transition for me and the music must go on. I am looking forward to the new tunes in my life.

Do you have any new artists that inspire you?

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  1. The one major thing my momma and I shared was our love of classic country music, it was what she raised me on. After she died it has been so difficult to listen to those songs, even those opening notes. It’s not that I don’t like them any more it just brings such an overwhelming feeling of several emotions at once it’s kind of unbearable most days to deal with. I too have found other music. I started listening to rock around Christmas because that’s what my brother listens to mostly.

  2. i love that your first date was to a live concert! How fun! I agree that music is a powerful tool to motivate and inspire postive moods.

  3. What a beautiful story. I love that you got to see Elton John in such a special and unexpected way. Tiny Dance is my daughters favorite song. I think it is so wonderful that you have found music again. I love all music but am especially partial to music from the 60’s and 70’s as my dad played it when I was a child.

  4. I love the latest Imelda May album but most of my tastes are from the past, Bowie and Kate Bush, The KInks, Beatles and Stones etc.

  5. Music has always helped me out too. I love music that really moves me–Tiny Dancer is a great one.

  6. Adelle inspires me a lot! but i hear every type of music! I love working with music, music makes me feel like Im having fun more that stressing about the job itself!

  7. I love Jimmy Buffet and his tropical beachy songs. As a California girl who spends three months a year on the west coat beaches of Mexico – I’m all about the ocean, sand, sun and fabulous music that reflects a laid-back tropical vibe. 🙂

  8. I like music as well. I don’t have an ear for it, and if I will start singing the world will explode, but music is great. It can help you go over some hard times or just not fall asleep at work :)). Thanks for sharing this great article

  9. Music can be so meaningful. I remember the first songs I listened to with my husband as…it sounds as though it s bittersweet remembrance to hear all of your old favorite songs. Love to you <3

  10. I can’t imagine how difficult it would be to enjoy something again that you and your husband loved so dearly together. I’m glad you have found an artist that ignites that love for music again. Music is incredibly soothing to me, in every mood. Recently I vacillate between john denver, 80’s hairbands, and 90’s pop on pandora…

  11. How lovely that your first date was a concert I think that is really unusual these days. I like that you went to see Elton John and hope you can go to many more concerts x

  12. Music has its power to seal and bring back memories. I’m mostly fond of pop artists but do enjoy chorale music as well. 🙂

  13. So sorry about your loss. You and Mike created many great memories together and no one can take that from you. Yeah, Regina Spektor makes great music. My taste is eclectic, r&b and much inbetween. Music is healing so, I get that too. Hugs and love to you.<3

  14. What a wonderful first date idea!! Music is powerful, can bring back memories and feelings like nothing else.

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